British International Pre-School & FS1/2. After-School Activity Centre. Child Psychological Services Department.
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Coping with the child’s feelings about separation

Coping with the child’s feelings about separation Some young children are fine about being separated from their mother but many of them feel some anxiety. It is very important to take particular care to address the emotional needs of your young child when they are going to be separated from you while you. It is important to plan and prepare for parting and for coming back together, as these transition times are difficult for the child and for you.

For instance, you can ease the parting by leaving your child with a loved object – a favourite teddy or piece of blanket – or something familiar of your own that smells of you and feels like part of you. No matter what kind of childcare is arranged young children can experience separation anxiety. This means that when the mother (or another adult to whom the child is attached – their father or a ‘mother-figure’) leaves, the child may show signs of panic, distress or rage. Crying and clinging are normal reactions.

The child may feel they are ‘falling apart’ without the comfort of the person who is most familiar to them. It is not unusual for the child to be cold and withdrawn when their parent comes back, giving the parent the experience of feeling rejected. It will take a little time for you to see whether your child has settled. The tears and tantrums when you leave, and clinging or rejection when you come back, are not necessarily a sign that your child has not settled, but may be an expression of how they feel about the separation. This is to be expected when a child moves into the wider world and has to adjust to the changes. It does not necessarily mean that you have made the wrong choice of childcare, or that you should give up work.

Starting pre-school or nursery school is an important stage in the separation process and the feelings aroused or battles waged at an earlier stage often re-emerge at this point. Many children embrace this change without a backward glance. It is sometimes the mother in this situation who feels sad and disappointed at having to let go and move on. Some children feel very ready for the stimulus of other children, toys, educational challenges and all that the new world of pre-school or nursery school has to offer. But many young children who are developing normally nevertheless find this particular stage of life very difficult. They may express their feelings through crying and clinging. They may also return to baby habits and behaviour, such as thumb-sucking, bedwetting or accidents at school, tantrums and baby language. It is as if they are giving their parents the message that they want to go backwards to a more comfortable time rather than forwards to the next stage. It is common for parents to see enormous swings between moods of great dependence and independence – a little baby one minute and an assertive and exploratory three-year-old the next.

Our Philosophy

Each child is a person of worth deserving of our love and respect. Each child is unique with his/her own needs, interests, abilities and growth rate. Each child is a creative person who needs opportunities to experiment with a variety of materials and to develop social skills in an age appropriate setting.

Oxford House Activity Centre

Students that participate in after-school programmes have better school attendance, higher grades and bigger aspirations. After-school activities start at 4pm-7pm. Call Us and find out more on:

A love for Learning

We instil love for learning and art. We do this in close partnership with parents by ensuring that your child is attending a warm and loving nursery. We also support parents with the foundations for discipline as these are laid down in the early years. We use different strategies as children develop greater independence, self regulation and responsibility. build character

Building Characters

After-school activities can provide enrichment, adventure and variety. They can enhance knowledge and build character. build character

Our Approach

Education is a fun and challenging process. Our experienced and qualified staff use child-centred learning methods such as Montessori. Our approach

Encouraging students to speak English

We help students make better progress. Our teachers encourage them to converse more frequently with our native English speakers. They can also take part in activities that require them to speak or read English. Ask about our English Drama club.

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Empowering Imagination

We monitor children's interests and developmental progress, which enables us to 'go with the child'. Children are thus empowered and their levels of confidence and imagination are insurmountable. imagination

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